Just Thinking....

So I've pretty much wanted to have every career on the planet, like I'm Barbie or some shit. Sometimes I wonder what my future holds.

Don't you wish you had a machine that lets you see what you're doing like 10 years from now?
Man I do.

At one point I wanted to go to school for zoology and run a zoo just like Steve Irwin. I wanted to jump on alligators and crocodiles and shit. I wanted the khaki outfit, and the white Land Rover truck. That was then. For some reason that dream faded away and I don't know why exactly. NO one discourage me or anything.

Next, I wanted to be just like Diane Sawyer. I wanted to host the national news show. Interview great people. She's still one of my heroes, I just don't want that anymore. Idk why that dream didn't last either.

Now I really want to go to school for psychology/psychiatry but before that I wanted to do journalism. I wanted to write for Rolling Stone/SPIN/Complex/Cosmo/Vogue just pretty much every magazine out there. I still want to do journalism though. Is that really my dream? I think I'm the only one that should know the answer to that.

It's sad that you have to choose one life you want to live over another. Why can't I be a psychiatrist and cover runway shows. Would both be too time consuming. I want to be the one in my thick framed glasses taking pics with icons and interviewing them. I want the pencil sitting on my ear and a notepad in my back pocket. I want to document my experiences.

But at the same time, I want to be the one in the white coat in my thick framed glasses. Talking to patients. Clicking my pen, writing down my observations. I want to know why the patient acts the he/she does.

You would think I'd have this shit figured out by now, but I really don't. I don't know exactly what I'll be doing. At some points, I don't think I wanna know for real. Whatever happens I just want to enjoy it.

Enjoyment is a rarely known key of success. You must fully enjoy to fully succeed.